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Conflict is inherent in your everyday experience. You meet conflict at the school gate, in traffic, at work, in your home, with friends, family and strangers.
All situations of conflict, be they external or internal, affect the body. For most, conflict is threatening. And that threat activates an ancient response within known as The Stress Response or more colloquially fight, flight.
Have you ever needed resolve to follow through on something in service of a larger goal? Or fiercely defended a person, belief, purpose or value that is dear to you and under threat? Have you taken decisive action, even in the face of opposition or disinterest in service of integrity? Are you ever bravely vulnerable in your relationships and share something with a partner or friend where there is the risk they will laugh at, or ridicule, you? Do you open yourself to risk of failure? If you have done any of these, you would have recruited the Warrior archetype.
Conversely, if you haven’t, would it serve you to cultivate Warrior, so that you are better able to honour these qualities in yourself?
Lover is the archetype of love, tolerance, compassion and empathy. Lover shows us the beauty of connection, humanity and our capacity to care for ourselves, each other and the world. Through intimacy, Lover shows us how we are all the same. Sometimes, the hurts of life are too much. Lover cannot always keep the heart open. There are times connection is too hard. When this happens, we close down and withdraw.
And it is right to do so. Sometimes, turning inward allows the reflection, synthesis and transformation required to open again with more strength. The broken heart requires tenderness, care and nurturing to heal.
What brings you joy? What lights you up? If you were to “follow your bliss”, as Joseph Campbell said, what would you do? Who would you be? When I ask these questions, sometimes people say “well, that’s just fantasy!!” in a cynical way. If that’s you, this blog is not for you. If these questions touch a longing inside of you, a spark or flame that wants to burn brighter, then you might well find something interesting in what lies below.
Where is your attention right now? Perhaps you’re reading this on your mobile or tablet and app notifications are pinging and appearing on your screen? Maybe you’re on your laptop or desktop and e-mails are arriving in your in box? Are the kids calling for your attention or distracting you? Does the phone pull at your attention as you read? Do the voices of colleagues get your attention or are you distracted when they knock on your office door? We live in a busy world…………………………..
Do you ever feel like it’s Groundhog Day? Do you feel stuck in an area of your life and think that it’s never going to change? That no matter how hard you try, this situation is never going to be any different? Are there things in your life where you know you haven’t moved forward or notice that you keep bumping up against the same obstacles? Is that frustrating to you? Are you fed up with the repetition and sense of Groundhog Day?
How is morale at work right now? How connected do people feel with each other, their teams, the organisation? What challenges are they facing within work and beyond? Are those challenges getting addressed? Are people talking to each other in a meaningful and supportive way about these challenges? And is there anyone listening? Just talking about the challenges you’re facing isn’t enough. You need someone to listen. Both are important.
During these long months of working from home, spending so much time online, blending work life with home life and home schooling, the need for boundaries is more important than ever. Not just creating and maintaining boundaries with other people. But also, and perhaps more importantly, honouring the boundaries with yourself that are for your well-being, resilience and resourcefulness.
People are finding these boundaries increasingly challenging. Perhaps you are an HR manager or team leader who is noticing your colleagues working longer hours, feeling more fatigued and showing signs of diminished resilience. Or maybe you are recognising these signs within yourself? The question is, “What can you do about it?”
When the coronavirus pandemic started, we were encouraged to use an “elbow bump”. An informal and COVID-safe greeting that replaced the handshake. In 2021, however, I have been introduced to the Corona Bow. I think I prefer bowing to bumping. It points to self-respect, mutual appreciation, trust and humility. But, what does bowing have to do with coaching?
What gifts can you offer the world and how will you share those gifts? How would you like to share your contribution? What legacy would you love to leave to subsequent generations?
The Hero’s Journey is a quest born from endless questioning “There must be more to life than this?” By stepping out of your comfort zone and embracing your dragons, you discover the gifts of your greatness and wholeness. Once more connected to this inner source, you step into your power and authority, empowering you to give your gifts fully and leave a meaningful legacy and contribution to the world.
+44 (0) 7980 204946
david@potentialitycoaching.co.uk
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